{"id":885764,"date":"2015-11-25T06:15:26","date_gmt":"2015-11-25T13:15:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/?p=885764"},"modified":"2025-12-17T11:49:15","modified_gmt":"2025-12-17T18:49:15","slug":"getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/","title":{"rendered":"Getting Beyond Emotion in Mediation"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Tony Lehman | The Dispute Resolver | November 23, 2015<\/p>\n<p>Legal research and scientific research &#8212; especially in the psychological realm &#8212; overlap from time to time. A recent article in the ABA Journal was titled &#8220;Mediators find more tools through neuroscience&#8221; discusses how decision making in mediation may not be as logical and rational as we once thought.<\/p>\n<p>Division 1 Member and Mediator Wendy Fassberg\u00a0has seen this first hand in her practice in Los Angeles County, California. \u00a0Wendy&#8217;s practice focuses on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/how-new-aaa-construction-arbitration-rules-and-mediation-procedures-are-enacted\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">mediation<\/a> involving homeowner association disputes, with a particular emphasis on construction-defect issues. The article below outlines how mediators need to focus on the emotional aspects involved in getting to settlements in that context in particular, but it applies across the spectrum in the construction industry. \u00a0We thank Wendy for graciously providing this article to Division 1.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Getting Beyond Emotions Typically Present\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>When Mediating with Common Interest Developments<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>by Wendy J. Fassberg, Esq.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Too often, disputes arise between the end users in common interest developments and the design and construction team that developed, designed, and built the subject property, whether the project is a condominium community, a gated community, or a mixed use development.\u00a0 \u00a0What the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/architects-and-design-professionals-can-be-held-liable-for-defects-based-on-third-party-claims\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">design and construction professionals<\/a> must understand when trying to resolve these types of disputes is that, notwithstanding the fact that they may be dealing with a board of directors or officers of the HOA, the individuals with whom they have their dispute are homeowners dealing with their homes.\u00a0 Most disputes that involve homeowners are emotionally charged.\u00a0 The parties come to the table angry, resentful, hurt, fearful, or feeling vengeful.\u00a0 Paradoxically, these emotions can be present even in a purely business, market relationship.\u00a0 So, they are understandably a factor in many homeowner disputes where the issues are typically very personal.<\/p>\n<p>One of the greatest impediments to the successful resolution of conflict is emotion.\u00a0 Under a behaviorist approach, it is posited that because the parties are in conflict, they are so embroiled in that conflict that they experience a high level of stress, which causes them to put blinders on and to hyper-focus only on the conflict.\u00a0 They have no peripheral vision which would allow them to see how this conflict integrates into the rest of their lives.\u00a0 They have the selectivity of considering only their own position, often consulting family, friends, and fellow HOA members for opinions that are, of course, guaranteed to boost their sense of confidence.\u00a0 This leads to an inflated sense of power.\u00a0 And sometimes the attorneys get just as invested in the conflict as their clients.<\/p>\n<p>But, if there is so much emotion involved, can <a href=\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/understanding-arbitration-clauses-in-contracts-litigation-mediation-arbitration-united-states\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">mediation<\/a> actually be effective in connection with these disputes?\u00a0 There are several ways that emotion laden parties can improve the chances of resolving their dispute at mediation.\u00a0 The first is to recognize when emotion rather than reason is directing their actions.\u00a0 Once having acknowledged this important fact, there needs to be an understanding that when trying to resolve a dispute, the existence of emotion as a driving factor generally works against one\u2019s own interests.\u00a0 Therefore, ideally emotions should be checked at the door before entering the mediation.\u00a0 This can be accomplished by stepping back from the controversy, and thinking through the ramifications of moving forward with litigation or other similarly costly alternatives.\u00a0 Sometimes parties can do this on their own before mediation, and sometimes they need help.\u00a0 The mediator is hired to be the one who is not in a state of conflict, and who is charged with remaining clear and mindful of the big picture.\u00a0 It is the mediator\u2019s job to help shift and change the parties\u2019 thought process.\u00a0 This includes working to bring the parties to the understanding that there are emotions present and how those emotions affect their decision making.\u00a0 The mediator must then coax the participants back to a place where they can rationally evaluate their options and their alternatives.\u00a0 For example, because mediation is conducted in a somewhat informal setting relative to arbitration and litigation, but one which is nonetheless overseen by a mediator, the parties can feel free to express their emotions during mediation.\u00a0 This can sometimes provide a path toward rational decision making.\u00a0 It is the ability of a party to \u201clet it all out\u201d that clears the way for them to compromise and reach a settlement.\u00a0 Sometimes people just want to be heard.\u00a0 Some are satisfied to tell their story and vent to the mediator, and some demand that the other parties hear what they have to say.\u00a0 Design and construction professionals and their counsel must be mindful of this and accept, even invite this release in mediation.\u00a0 Once having been heard, these parties are often ready to ramp down and look at practical solutions.<\/p>\n<p>Timing can also play an important role in getting past emotional barriers in mediation.\u00a0 If it is&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/abaconstructionforumdivision1.blogspot.com\/2015\/11\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediations.html?utm_source=feedburner&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_campaign=Feed%3A+TheDisputeResolver+%28The+Dispute+Resolver%29\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">To finish reading this article<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Tony Lehman | The Dispute Resolver | November 23, 2015 Legal research and scientific research &#8212; especially in the psychological realm &#8212; overlap from time to time. A recent article in the ABA Journal was titled &#8220;Mediators find more tools through neuroscience&#8221; discusses how decision making in mediation may not be as logical and rational&hellip; <a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Getting Beyond Emotion in Mediation<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[41,164,436],"tags":[164,79],"class_list":["post-885764","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-arbitration","category-construction-dispute","category-dispute-resolution-2","tag-construction-dispute","tag-mediation-2","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v25.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Getting Beyond Emotion in Mediation - Advise &amp; Consult, Inc.<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"decision making in mediation may not be as logical and rational as we once thought\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Getting Beyond Emotion in Mediation - Advise &amp; Consult, Inc.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"decision making in mediation may not be as logical and rational as we once thought\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Advise &amp; Consult, Inc.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Advise-Consult-Inc-126949043996790\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2015-11-25T13:15:26+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2025-12-17T18:49:15+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@adviseconsult\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@adviseconsult\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/0a11abe008083d5fb19c2b0feefe7bd7\"},\"headline\":\"Getting Beyond Emotion in Mediation\",\"datePublished\":\"2015-11-25T13:15:26+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2025-12-17T18:49:15+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/\"},\"wordCount\":813,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#organization\"},\"keywords\":[\"Construction Dispute\",\"mediation\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Arbitration\",\"Construction Dispute\",\"Dispute Resolution\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/\",\"name\":\"Getting Beyond Emotion in Mediation - Advise &amp; Consult, Inc.\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2015-11-25T13:15:26+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2025-12-17T18:49:15+00:00\",\"description\":\"decision making in mediation may not be as logical and rational as we once thought\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/\",\"name\":\"Advise &amp; Consult, Inc.\",\"description\":\"Construction Expert Witnesses\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#organization\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#organization\",\"name\":\"Advise & Consult\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/\",\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/AC-Red-Logo.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/AC-Red-Logo.png\",\"width\":162,\"height\":75,\"caption\":\"Advise & Consult\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Advise-Consult-Inc-126949043996790\/\",\"https:\/\/x.com\/adviseconsult\",\"https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/company-beta\/204526\/\",\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/user\/MrConstructionExpert\"]},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/0a11abe008083d5fb19c2b0feefe7bd7\",\"name\":\"admin\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/b01e71b7acadd7657af782b7ad1a30cc?s=96&d=mm&r=pg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/b01e71b7acadd7657af782b7ad1a30cc?s=96&d=mm&r=pg\",\"caption\":\"admin\"},\"sameAs\":[\"http:\/\/www.expertwitnessinconstruction.com\"]}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Getting Beyond Emotion in Mediation - Advise &amp; Consult, Inc.","description":"decision making in mediation may not be as logical and rational as we once thought","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Getting Beyond Emotion in Mediation - Advise &amp; Consult, Inc.","og_description":"decision making in mediation may not be as logical and rational as we once thought","og_url":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/","og_site_name":"Advise &amp; Consult, Inc.","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Advise-Consult-Inc-126949043996790\/","article_published_time":"2015-11-25T13:15:26+00:00","article_modified_time":"2025-12-17T18:49:15+00:00","author":"admin","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@adviseconsult","twitter_site":"@adviseconsult","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"admin","Est. reading time":"4 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/"},"author":{"name":"admin","@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/0a11abe008083d5fb19c2b0feefe7bd7"},"headline":"Getting Beyond Emotion in Mediation","datePublished":"2015-11-25T13:15:26+00:00","dateModified":"2025-12-17T18:49:15+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/"},"wordCount":813,"commentCount":0,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#organization"},"keywords":["Construction Dispute","mediation"],"articleSection":["Arbitration","Construction Dispute","Dispute Resolution"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/","url":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/","name":"Getting Beyond Emotion in Mediation - Advise &amp; Consult, Inc.","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#website"},"datePublished":"2015-11-25T13:15:26+00:00","dateModified":"2025-12-17T18:49:15+00:00","description":"decision making in mediation may not be as logical and rational as we once thought","inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/getting-beyond-emotion-in-mediation\/"]}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/","name":"Advise &amp; Consult, Inc.","description":"Construction Expert Witnesses","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#organization","name":"Advise & Consult","url":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/AC-Red-Logo.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/AC-Red-Logo.png","width":162,"height":75,"caption":"Advise & Consult"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Advise-Consult-Inc-126949043996790\/","https:\/\/x.com\/adviseconsult","https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/company-beta\/204526\/","https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/user\/MrConstructionExpert"]},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/0a11abe008083d5fb19c2b0feefe7bd7","name":"admin","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/b01e71b7acadd7657af782b7ad1a30cc?s=96&d=mm&r=pg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/b01e71b7acadd7657af782b7ad1a30cc?s=96&d=mm&r=pg","caption":"admin"},"sameAs":["http:\/\/www.expertwitnessinconstruction.com"]}]}},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2ztG6-3Iqw","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/885764","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=885764"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/885764\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":905150,"href":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/885764\/revisions\/905150"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=885764"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=885764"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.myconstructionexpert.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=885764"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}